BrandenP
A
I didn’t watch the Super Bowl & I don’t want anyone to explain it to me, but from what I understand, WikiFeet has TV commercials now?
02:29 PM - Feb 13, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Everyone poor out some nutritional yeast for Bob Moore #RIP #BobsRedMill
02:27 PM - Feb 12, 2024
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BrandenP
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Shop like a billionaire (by exploiting the people making and delivering the crap you buy). #Temu
07:36 PM - Feb 11, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Gotta do my yearly bit:

I only watch the Puppy Bowl for the commercials
02:34 PM - Feb 11, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Hey hey! It’s my first podcast appearance of 2024!
https://legionofstupid.com...
02:30 PM - Feb 09, 2024
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BrandenP
A
I’m dreading the day Jimmy Page or Robert Plant die … only because of the hack “Stairway To Heaven” jokes people will try to make.
02:28 PM - Feb 07, 2024
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BrandenP
A
thread 2 Threaded Spouts
Men (to Women): You need to stop paying so much attention to gossip & celebrities, and really invest your mental energy into stuff that matters!
Women: Okay!
02:18 PM - Feb 05, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Men (to Women): You need to quit carrying around your Starbucks cup and drinking that sugary coffee crap all the time. Start drinking more water!

Women: Okay! (start drinking water from big metal cups)

Men: No, not like that…
12:58 PM - Feb 02, 2024
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BrandenP
A
I’m so glad our politicians are finally laying into the heads of social media companies, since social media is the leading killer of children…

Oh nevermind, it’s GUNS!
https://www.cdc.gov/violen...
11:50 AM - Feb 01, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Men (to Women): You should stop listening to that music where the singer doesn’t write any of their songs & can’t play any instruments. Listen to a real Artist!
Women: Okay! (start listening to Taylor Swift)
Men: No, not like that…
12:14 PM - Jan 31, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Men (to Women): You don’t learn anything by reading those romance novels & fiction. Why don’t you read something non-fiction and improve yourself.

Women: Okay! (start reading True Crime)

Men: No, not like that…
02:39 PM - Jan 30, 2024
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BrandenP
A
PAAS should start making vitamins. That way everyone’s pee can be all sorts of egg dye colors!
05:06 PM - Jan 26, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Where are the conservative think-pieces about all these planes Quiet Quitting in the middle of flights?
12:06 PM - Jan 24, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Hold on… Am I supposed to catch a narwhal in Dave The Diver? That’s fucked up!
07:49 PM - Jan 20, 2024
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BrandenP
A
This post has everything: The looming specter of death, hand holding, an awesome song that just came out this week, plus Simpsons AND Star Wars references!

https://open.substack.com/...
02:25 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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BrandenP
A
So, wouldn’t people that don’t have an internal monologue be immune to having their thoughts read? At least if the telepathic person had an internal monologue.
12:12 PM - Jan 15, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Were they just playing the Pokémon theme on football?!
10:07 PM - Jan 14, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Is polyamory getting more spotlight nowadays because soon it’ll be impossible to live with only a double income?
05:07 PM - Jan 11, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Why am I only finding out now Explosions In The Sky is playing in Tahoe at the end of the month?!
07:48 PM - Jan 09, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Am I the only one jaded enough to think that Bill Pumpkin already has a guitarist ready to go, but are “taking applications” from “anyone” just to generate buzz?
01:53 PM - Jan 07, 2024
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BrandenP
A
Just because Green Day started making overtly political songs over 15 years into being a band, doesn’t make them fucking RATM.
05:06 PM - Jan 04, 2024
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BrandenP
A
I know it’s been a hard year & holiday season for some people out there, but hopefully you can take comfort in this fact: Ponyo loves ham!
12:13 PM - Dec 30, 2023
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BrandenP
A
I gotta remember to say “See you next year” to all my coworkers when I leave today, or else they might get the impression that I have a sense of humor
02:30 PM - Dec 29, 2023
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BrandenP
A
Only having Covid once is the new Never Got Covid
05:13 PM - Dec 22, 2023
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BrandenP
A
At the pet store, and I can’t find any of the huge bags of senior pet food. Do they not make them?

Then I break my own heart when I figure out why…
03:02 PM - Dec 18, 2023
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BrandenP
A
Did Texting kill Talking On The Phone, or was it Shitty Cell Phone Compression?
06:04 PM - Dec 16, 2023
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BrandenP
A
Hold on! Pete Doherty is still alive!?
05:12 PM - Dec 08, 2023
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BrandenP
A
Instead of saying “Smile” while they pose for a picture, the people behind me are saying “Taxation is theft.”
I bet they’re fun to hang out with 🙄
05:03 PM - Dec 02, 2023
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BrandenP
A
I COULD just post a Spotify Wrapped (if I used that service), or I could give you some honest-to-god content!
https://open.substack.com/...
02:21 PM - Nov 30, 2023
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BrandenP
A
Fucking FINALLY! Rest In Piss!
09:52 PM - Nov 29, 2023
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