Castle Long

Castle Long

@W0rdsmith

A

308 Spouts 126 Followers 32 Following

58 years old, cis, het, disabled. Agoraphobe, demophobe, subject to anxiety and panic attacks. On the autism spectrum. I write a LOT!

Pinned

Hi! I'm Castle, and I'm weird. I read, I watch stuff, and I write. I write a LOT. Unpublished, OK with that. Write sci-fi, science fantasy and fantasy. ALWAYS have an element of mystery.

I'm a cis/het-old-white-guy. LGBTQIA/BLM/feminist friendly. I hate bigots, so am happy about this place!

10:36 PM - Feb 03, 2023

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@Spoutible , I haven't been able to get to this site for DAYS, and am still unable to without using a VPN or that weird TOR browser. Help? I dislike having to do either.

01:12 AM - Nov 08, 2023

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Castle Long echoed

@LovelyLove2024

This.

01:15 AM - Oct 04, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
There's nothing better than the feeling of someone playing with your hair or running their fingers down your back.
Unless you thought you were alone....

10:53 PM - Oct 03, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
If roosters can start their day by screaming then damn it, so can I!

11:05 PM - Oct 02, 2023

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Okay, my alt-text person isn't around, and I want a day off anyway: From now on, no Nightly Chortle on Sundays, folks. Hope you don't mind.

11:11 PM - Oct 01, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Picture of a young child, 4-6 years old, sitting in the child ride-along seat on the back of a bicycle, looking away from the exposed buttcrack of the parent on the main seat, and looking... unsettled, at the minimum.
Caption reads: Later that day, Sally taught herself to ride her own bike.

11:19 PM - Sep 30, 2023

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Castle Long echoed

John Bolton's Mustache✅️

@John_Boltons_Mustache

Pardon my language but...

Fucking cocksuckers. 😡

MEAction NOW @MEActNOW

😱😱
House Republicans sneak in pay raise for themselves into shutdown bill

https://www.meidastouch.co...
10:37 PM - Sep 30, 2023

10:44 PM - Sep 30, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
The problem with some people... is that they exist.

12:27 AM - Sep 30, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Meme with a picture of a confused-looking Minion from the "Despicable Me" series of movies with the caption:
Told someone to spell "orange," and they asked "the fruit or the color?"

12:07 AM - Sep 29, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Meme with a generic drawing of a woman's face (from "Some ECards") that reads:
I think they should have hospitals for creationists where you are only treated with prayer. None of that medical or science stuff.

11:49 PM - Sep 27, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Older man at a table, looking at the camera, saying, "I don't always talk to philosophy majors, but when I do... I order large fries."

09:17 PM - Sep 26, 2023

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Sorry I missed the Chortle last night. Ate something that VIOLENTLY disagreed with me, and ended up in bed early.

03:09 PM - Sep 26, 2023

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I am weak of will.

As I type this, "Baldur's Gate 3" is downloading.

03:28 PM - Sep 25, 2023

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Castle Long echoed

Epic. [stands, applaudes] 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

08:11 PM - Apr 04, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
I asked the librarian if the library had any books about paranoia.
She whispered: "They're right behind you...."

10:34 PM - Sep 24, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text-only meme that reads:
Back off. I've had enough to deal with today without having to make your death look like an accident.

10:31 PM - Sep 23, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Screen capture of a tweet that reads:
Any zombie movie that doesn't have hordes of people running towards the zombies to deliberately get bitten because they're convinced it's a liberal hoax is going to look pretty unrealistic now.

10:50 PM - Sep 22, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Meme with a picture and quote from "Shrek."
Above both, it says, "Authors when writing their books:"
The picture is of Lord Farquaad on his balcony, saying,
"Some of you may die, but that is a sacrifice I am willing to make."

10:41 PM - Sep 21, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Meme with the caption:
Me: Breaks the neck of my enemy to save ammo.
Then, over a picture of a shocked and scared-looking man:
Everyone else at Lazertag:

10:02 PM - Sep 20, 2023

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I got it down to three.... troglodyte, because it sounds like what it means, furshlugginer, because it's so... evocative of a feeling, and rapscallion, because it SOUNDS fun!

Read aBannedBook @RetiredLibrarian

Do you have a favorite word that you just like the sound of? Mine is facetious, with kerfuffle in second place.
10:38 PM - Jul 26, 2023

01:53 PM - Sep 20, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Picture of Uncle Fester from the original "Addams Family" TV show.
The text framing the picture reads:
"I always start my day with the best of intentions and a positive attitude.
"And then, you know... PEOPLE happen!"

11:23 PM - Sep 19, 2023

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Okay. Here, with what I sincerely hope is enough context, is an acronym. Anyone want to tell me what it means? I'm hoping it's not that difficult, but my brain... does strange things, sometimes, so I can't be sure.

"(Don’t ask. ICTYBIHTKY.)"

(Substitute a word or a blank for the K, so algorhit

08:56 PM - Sep 19, 2023 (Edited)

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads--
Why I Write:
Because kidnapping people and forcing them to act out your interesting, make-believe stories is technically illegal.

09:34 PM - Sep 18, 2023

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Migraine. No chortle tonight.

10:55 PM - Sep 17, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
I'm sick of numbers defining me.
My gpa, my SAT score,
my weight,
my first degree murder convictions,
my grades.
These things are not who I am.

11:42 PM - Sep 16, 2023

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Still having fun with the WIP!

"He was involved with a DRHP project called (of all things) BOAST. This acronym stood for “Biological Optimization and Augmentation for Special-use Troops. [1/2]

09:04 PM - Sep 16, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Text only meme that reads:
[Haunted house]
Walks in, sees dead body on the floor with "your next" [spelled y-o-u-r] written on wall in blood.
*dips finger in blood*
*writes YOU'RE* [spelled y-o-u-'-r-e]

11:30 PM - Sep 15, 2023

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I am having a great deal of fun writing the viewpoint character in this bit:

"(Yes, I know, you prefer the simple initial V over the name Valor. I’m old and wealthy, and shall, therefore, do as I damn please. Cope, dear boy.)"

08:34 PM - Sep 15, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

Screencap from Boston Market's Twitter.
First tweet from Boston Market: "What's something you can say to both your rotisserie chicken and your significant other?"
Reply from a woman: "I prefer you without skin."
Boston Market's reply is a flat "what?"

09:51 PM - Sep 14, 2023

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The Nightly Chortle:

A picture of a stove with a lit burner, but nothing on that burner, a cast iron skillet with nothing but an empty eggshell in it over an unlit burner, and a raw egg on the stovetop between burners. The caption reads, "This is your brain on FOX News. Any questions?"

10:33 PM - Sep 13, 2023

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