2 Threaded Spouts
I keep seeing different states passing more laws to limit access to abortion & every damn time, all I can think about is this; we are essentially allowing rapists to choose the mothers of their children & people are cheering for this?
09:56 AM - Apr 28, 2024
Guys, are you against abortion? Cool, get a vasectomy. See how easy that was?
09:53 AM - Apr 20, 2024
Relationship advice:
Always make sure you're the crazier one!
Always make sure you're the crazier one!
01:15 PM - Feb 26, 2024
Plot twist:
Maybe eating ice cream isn't cheating my diet.
Maybe going on a diet is cheating on my ice cream. 🤔
Maybe eating ice cream isn't cheating my diet.
Maybe going on a diet is cheating on my ice cream. 🤔
10:15 AM - Jan 31, 2024
Seriously, some of y'all should be carrying around live plants to replace the oxygen you're wasting. Stop believing everything you see in your newsfeeds posted by morons from high school who post dumb shit on social media & use that lump on your shoulders for more than holding your hat. Verify shit!
09:54 PM - Jan 30, 2024
George Santos, arriving at Trump's #NewHampshirePrimary event like...
#GOPClownShowContinues #CriminalsOnParade #LookMaTheyLetMeLeaveTheState #SantosForPrison2024 #TrumpForPrison20ToLifeIn24 #TheyKnowWeCanSeeThemRight ?
#GOPClownShowContinues #CriminalsOnParade #LookMaTheyLetMeLeaveTheState #SantosForPrison2024 #TrumpForPrison20ToLifeIn24 #TheyKnowWeCanSeeThemRight ?
11:06 PM - Jan 23, 2024
Ignoranus: someone who is both stupid and an asshole.
11:43 PM - Jan 11, 2024
I'm a lot like Christmas lights in that I am complicated to unravel and an absolute f*cking mess under the surface, but once you untangle me and light me up, I can be ridiculously festive and quite pleasant. #MerryEffingChristmas #SpreadingJoyAndShit
11:21 PM - Dec 23, 2023
Instead of presents, this year I'm giving everyone my opinion. You can get excited now. No, really.
11:54 AM - Dec 20, 2023
Hmmmmm, if my body is a temple, that would make me part of a religion and, therefore, I don't need to pay taxes, amirite? Yeah, let's go with that. #501CForEveryone #NoMoreTaxes
12:07 PM - Dec 11, 2023
If anyone is Chrismas shopping for me and needs ideas, I'm a size large first class seat to somewhere tropical. #CalgonTakeMeAway .
10:35 AM - Dec 11, 2023
Has anyone else ever considered that maybe The Grinch would have been a whole lot nicer if some baritone-voiced dude wasn't constantly singing about what a piece of shit he is for an entire month every year?🤔 #YoureAMeanOneMrGrinch #StinkStankStunk #MerryGrinchmas
03:09 PM - Dec 09, 2023
I'm an apocaloptimist, someone that knows it's all going to turn to shit, yet still somehow believes it'll all be OK in the end.
12:31 AM - Dec 05, 2023
Andrea Wikso
@kismet66
I can already hear Monday whispering "I'm comin' for you, bitch and there ain't a damn thing you can do about it," followed by a maniacal, evil laugh. This can't be good. 😬
@kismet66
I can already hear Monday whispering "I'm comin' for you, bitch and there ain't a damn thing you can do about it," followed by a maniacal, evil laugh. This can't be good. 😬
09:40 PM - Dec 03, 2023
02:11 PM - Nov 29, 2023
Does anyone else think it's strange that the same people that:
*use powerful, handheld computers
*on internet platforms
*by way of satellites in geosynchronous orbit
*suspended 22,236 miles above us in space
*to instantly speak to people all over the world...
don't believe in science???🤦
*use powerful, handheld computers
*on internet platforms
*by way of satellites in geosynchronous orbit
*suspended 22,236 miles above us in space
*to instantly speak to people all over the world...
don't believe in science???🤦
01:35 PM - Nov 26, 2023
I'm now at an age where I've thrown my back in my sleep and slipped a disc while sneezing and trying not to pee at the same time. What's next, total paralysis from trying to hold in an extended bout of ferocious, uncontrollable flatulence?
03:46 AM - Nov 22, 2023
I feel like my childhood let me down. How is it that Yogi Bear and Boo-Boo didn't live in the park with the most grizzly bears, living out their days, plotting the theft of pic-a-nic baskets & running afoul of Park Ranger Smith? #ChildhoodCheated #HannaBarberaLiedToUs #SmarterThanTheAverageBear
01:41 PM - Nov 19, 2023
Facebook should show you mutual blocks, not mutual friends. Nothing brings people together better than realizing "oh, YES, I hate that motherf*cker, too!"
01:44 AM - Nov 19, 2023
A childhood lesson:
Mr. Rogers knew his sh*t. As soon as you get home after a long day, kick off your shoes, change into comfy clothes, & immediately enter the neighborhood of make believe for some old-fashioned disassociation from the pain, uncaring harshness and terror of the real world.
Mr. Rogers knew his sh*t. As soon as you get home after a long day, kick off your shoes, change into comfy clothes, & immediately enter the neighborhood of make believe for some old-fashioned disassociation from the pain, uncaring harshness and terror of the real world.
03:23 PM - Nov 17, 2023
Stop asking people who run for office if they "believe" in climate change and start asking if they understand it. We're talking about science, not the tooth fairy, the Easter bunny or Santa Claus.
10:42 AM - Nov 16, 2023
I've realized that I'm at an age where, if somebody tells "STOP," I don't know if it's in the name of love, it's Hammer Time, or if I should collaborate and listen. Not sure i like this aging bullshit.
10:05 PM - Nov 14, 2023
Instead of buying coffee for the person behind you at #DunkinDonuts or #Starbucks , call or drop by your local school or library and pay the overdue bill for a kid's lunch or library charges. The people in line can afford it. Poor kids cant.
11:38 AM - Nov 11, 2023
Poverty exists not because we can't feed the poor, but solely because the uber-rich are never satisfied. They're coming for your Social Security next. Remember, we pay into that program. It is NOT an entitlement. Don't let them take it from you. VOTE for candidates that won't steal that $$ from us.
12:28 AM - Nov 10, 2023
I dunno who needs to hear this, but once women give themselves permission to age gratefully, the gracefully part will take care of itself. Be yourself, always. No one else in the world knows how to be you. Embrace the physical signs of aging. Celebrate every year. Too many don't get that chance.♥️
01:19 AM - Nov 08, 2023
It must be really sad thinking that scientists, scholars, historians, economist, and journalists have devoted their entire careers to deceiving you, while a reality TV con man with decades of fraud & exhaustively documented lying is your only beacon of truth and honesty, absent any proof whatsoever
02:55 PM - Nov 07, 2023
In my next life, I'm totally coming back with money, looks, and minions instead of this utterly unmarketable sparking personality horse shit.
11:12 PM - Nov 05, 2023
Anyone who doesn't understand freedom from religion, doesn't understand freedom or religion. Pass it on. #FakeChristians #1AAppliesToEveryone #FreedomOfReligion #FreedomFromReligion #KeepYourReligionToYourself
04:28 AM - Nov 05, 2023
As a woman, I have never once felt unsafe around gay or trans people, but I absolutely have worried about my safety around straight, conservative men who seem to think women are their property, all in the name of Jesus, apparently.
03:51 PM - Nov 04, 2023
Homophobia: the fear that gay men will treat you the way that you treat women.
01:29 PM - Nov 03, 2023
