1/15
I don't talk about this a lot but I just read an article about a New Jersey 6 year old joining Mensa so I'll tell a little bit of my story.
When I was 5 years old, about to enter Kindergarten after a year and a half at Headstart, my mother said I was really smart and she wanted me tested out.
When I was 5 years old, about to enter Kindergarten after a year and a half at Headstart, my mother said I was really smart and she wanted me tested out.
12:20 PM - Dec 08, 2023
2/15
I was her third child and both of my sisters tested out. The school was skeptical, which is stupid since her other 2 children tested out, but we were lower middle class Black people so.... Anyway, they set up all the testing. I don't remember a lot about it, but here's what I do remember.
12:21 PM - Dec 08, 2023
3/15
I was in a play room type area and there was a 2 way mirror. I knew because if you look hard enough you can see the other side. Anyway, I was barely 5 so I was like, "yeah toys." And there were these 2 white doctors, one old and one young. They wanted to ask me questions. They asked if that was OK.
12:23 PM - Dec 08, 2023
(Edited)
4/15
I said OK. I was a sweet and often compliant child. The young doctor said, "don't worry Montiese, there are no right or wrong answers." I said ok. I don't remember anything else. But I know that I "passed" with flying colors and was skipped to first grade at 5 years old.
12:24 PM - Dec 08, 2023
5/15
There was another 5 year old there, Ryan. I mostly remember him because he walked on his tippy toes. Anyhoo, it turns out that my IQ was 148 (this I learned from my mother, who has no reason to be dishonest imo). So I was in school but also twice a week I was in a different classroom.
12:26 PM - Dec 08, 2023
6/15
This classroom was for MG, which stood for mentally gifted. We were learning on very early computers, reading books, learning science, watching important films, going on cool trips to the planetarium and Franklin Mint to see coins being made. I stayed in MG through 8th grade.
12:28 PM - Dec 08, 2023
7/15
My grades were good, I was an A-B student who liked school up until 5th grade. 3 bad teachers in a row made me feel isolated, sad, angry, and they made sure that I understood that they thought I was a little smart freak and the other kids would feel the same. 2 of the teachers were white, one Black.
12:29 PM - Dec 08, 2023
8/15
Anyway, the point of all this is the New Jersey 6 year old has a 137 IQ and she's in Mensa and her parents are doing all of these outside activities with her to build her brain as well as her body.
And I wish my parents had understood that my high intelligence was more than a bragging point.
And I wish my parents had understood that my high intelligence was more than a bragging point.
12:31 PM - Dec 08, 2023
9/15
I needed to be nurtured and have it understood that trouble in school with bullies and being mostly socially awkward with children my age should have been addressed. My parents should've been working with the school to care for me. I was different and needed the extra attention.
12:32 PM - Dec 08, 2023
10/15
At home, I was dodging (badly) physical and emotional abuse from my older sister. When that wasn't going on I was making up vast worlds for my Little People and my Barbies, I started writing stories, and I was speeding through the encyclopedias my parents paid a lot of money for.
12:34 PM - Dec 08, 2023
11/15
I had 2 Cs in 8th grade so the school counselor said I couldn't get into the best high schools in the city, which only accepted one C. My mother didn't fight for me and to this day it is one of the things I hate her for (c'mon we all have one). My Cs were in Latin and algebra.
12:35 PM - Dec 08, 2023
12/15
No other middle schoolers were taking those classes except at my school. I know they would've made an exception, or made me test in, which I would've passed. But my mom just accepted it. I was sent to Germantown High School school, an hour away from home, which was a fuckin jungle.
12:37 PM - Dec 08, 2023
(Edited)
13/15
I was in a special program with about 35 other kids that focused on social science. It was a college prep program. We were going to be in the top 59 of the class when graduation came. We were going to college. We would be successful. It could've been really good but it was hell.
12:38 PM - Dec 08, 2023
14/15
Germantown was a neighborhood school so I had to walk the halls everyday with hood rats that weren't from my hood. I admit to being bullied and pushed around. Thankfully I never got into fights. I had a nervous breakdown at 14, surely helped along by school, and was diagnosed with depression.
12:40 PM - Dec 08, 2023
15/15
That's the life of a kid genius. Not all the time but a lot. When parents hear they have a little genius, they usually want to exploit it to their own benefit. We become models they can brag about & not children who need so much love, affection, and care it's ridiculous. Our genius does not love us.
12:42 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
I'm sorry you had to experience that. I had some similarities in my upbringing as well. I've never had my IQ tested, but skipping 5th grade was discussed decided against (for social reasons). I was in the gifted kids program in 5th grade, but voluntarily dropped because it made me uncool.
08:12 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Whoa!.
MG made Mr feel superior, but that's because I took a lot of shit from classmates about everything, even the sneakers I wore. So I was able to say to myself at least I'm smart and they're not. But I bet I've had more mental shit to deal with than a lot of them over the years.
11:31 PM - Dec 08, 2023
Only followers of this user (Goose) can see their posts
In response to Goose.
Man, Goose, I know this so, so well. And its really hard when you're an adult because you want to tell the universe to fuck off but these things are often happening at work, with family or in social groups and you can't snap on people.
08:01 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
From a Mom, whose son also skipped kindergarten and a Sis, I am very proud of you. 💜♾️🫂💯
05:22 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Miss Lil' Bit Angie.
Thank you. I survived thank God. And I'm also still pretty damn smart. I wish I had more time to be curious and learn things. I plan to go to the main public library come spring and explore some of the maps Columbus used looking for spices. I'm an topography geek.
05:24 PM - Dec 08, 2023
(Edited)
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
I was a gifted kid. Joined Mensa in my 20s (quit this year). But my parents raised me normally. My mom never understood anything I did in school, but was chill about that. My daughter is a gifted kid, but I never pushed her past her abilities. Just a normal childhood.
05:18 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Adrian James.
Gifted kids unite! I'm glad your parents gave you a normal childhood. Honestly my childhood was pretty normal too, on the surface. All if my siblings were as smart as me, but they both had violent tendencies and both my parents worked. Home could be as cellist as school.
05:21 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Adrian James.
It's sad that people push their kids when their kid has above-average intelligence. I never pull out the smart card unless I have to (destroyed a snooty associate attorney at my firm who was treating me a certain way; he never did that shit again).
05:21 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
This. So many times I was left to figure out on my own (with disastrous results at times) and still have trust issues because I raised myself. Intelligence brings the ability to adapt, we survived because we could figure it out. Doesn’t make it not lonely, though. (158, last time I was tested).
05:18 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Jacquelyn G..
Yeah, for as often as I had to make do and make it work, I don't know how I'm not dead. Like my parents really thought intelligence meant I could just get it done. I was still a child. What the fuck were they thinking? That's why I had a nervous breakdown, which I had little help recovering from.
05:28 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
Gods, Acey...I have often said that certain children get treated like trophies or accessories (especially in abusive homes). And that's just regular kids. What you're describing is a whole other level.
05:11 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Ground Control.
I was definitely a trophy sometimes, I think it's because I was sweet, compliant, and desperate for my parents' affection so if they wanted to parade me around, I'd wear my best dress. This incurred more wrath from my sister. She beat me up once b/c I showed mom one of my stories & she liked it.
05:31 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
Thanks you for sharing your experience. I can relate to this situation, being officially smart but completely out of place socially. I'd love to communicate more about it but am not ready to spill all publicly. Maybe a topic for a pod or a dm group??
05:00 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Andrea Ball.
You take your time and speak about it whenever you feel most comfortable. I won't lie and say it's easy. But now people are responding to it and we know we aren't alone.
05:05 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
Really appreciate you sharing your story. I can definitely relate because I went through a similar experience.
High IQ, special schools, always told how smart you were, but emotionally scarred because I never wanted that. I just wanted to be "normal".
Real double-edged sword.
High IQ, special schools, always told how smart you were, but emotionally scarred because I never wanted that. I just wanted to be "normal".
Real double-edged sword.
04:40 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Michael Freeman.
Definitely a double edged sword. I didn't mind being smart and the accolades that came with it. What sucked is that adults didn't think that I needed more. The emotional neglect I suffered because it was assumed my intellect made me mature, I'm still recovering from that.
05:07 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
I'm sorry you had to go through so much pain!
I don't know your parents, but quite a few of them are overwhelmed when dealing with a genius child. They should have had counseling to better support you.
I don't know your parents, but quite a few of them are overwhelmed when dealing with a genius child. They should have had counseling to better support you.
04:15 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Sabine Savvidis.
My parents in counseling, that's a laugh! They were good people but lousy parents. Too young, without proper skills and too much pride to really ask for help. They may have been overwhelmed if they put in more effort. They didn't do enough for that.
05:12 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Acey Deecey 🚀🚀.
I hear you. This is a hard story full of truths.
I too skipped a grade, took too many AP classes in HS, was a grind, started college at 16. I was socially far behind other kids. It took decades to get around the anxiety I had when I wasn't perfect. Funnily, poker helped because you lose so often.
I too skipped a grade, took too many AP classes in HS, was a grind, started college at 16. I was socially far behind other kids. It took decades to get around the anxiety I had when I wasn't perfect. Funnily, poker helped because you lose so often.
02:55 PM - Dec 08, 2023
In response to Linda Eisenstein.
I was 17 going into college. Had no idea how to balance that kind of life, was kicked out on academic dismissal after one year. A total washout. I spent a year and a half at home, a year in community College, then reapplied & returned to college in 1998. Then I was a year older than all my friends.
03:19 PM - Dec 08, 2023
