Kat Reed
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AAAA
Association Against Acronym Abuse
10:15 PM - May 13, 2024
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Kat Reed
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In politics, as with crime, always follow the money.
12:33 PM - May 13, 2024
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Kat Reed
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When I die, I'd like to go peacefully in my sleep, just like my Granddad, not screaming in terror like his passengers.
09:42 AM - May 12, 2024
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Kat Reed
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The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts.
01:50 AM - May 09, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Exercise the Devil! (he fecking hates star-jumps)
09:35 PM - May 07, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Just because there are a million other people sharing your lunacy with you does not make you any saner.
08:58 PM - May 06, 2024
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Kat Reed
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To quote Hamlet act 3, scene 3, line 87...
"No"
10:27 AM - May 05, 2024
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Kat Reed
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My life was changed forever when I opened the door to find __________.
02:52 AM - May 04, 2024
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Kat Reed
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The Infinite Monkey Theorem states that an infinite number of monkeys hitting keys at random on a computer keyboard for an infinite amount of time will almost surely type a given text, such as the complete works of William Shakespeare.

This theory has since been disproved by the internet!
01:48 AM - May 03, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Think for yourself! It really annoys the authorities.
01:27 AM - May 02, 2024
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Kat Reed
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In light of the "Bear vs Man" debate currently doing the rounds I have updated the Causes of Rape:
Short skirts 0%
Drinking 0%
Flirty behaviour 0%
A promiscuous past 0%
Walking alone 0%
Night time 0%
Bears 0%
Rapists 100%
09:40 PM - Apr 30, 2024
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Kat Reed
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My world-famous fruit salad may not contain any fruit, but more than makes up for it with chocolate
08:45 PM - Apr 30, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Should I ask what "happy gag time guy called order bit check" is all about?
11:27 AM - Apr 30, 2024
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Kat Reed
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"Mansplaining" is inherently sexist, so from now on we shall refer to it as "Correctile Dysfunction" which is gender neutral.
06:50 AM - Apr 29, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Everywhere I look I see negativity and tarmac...
Coincidence?
09:04 PM - Apr 26, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Frolicsome, now there's a word you can grow into.
01:03 AM - Apr 26, 2024
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Kat Reed
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The laws of population growth tell us that approximately half the people who were ever born in the history of the world are now dead. There is therefore a 50% probability that this status is being read by a corpse.
08:37 PM - Apr 24, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Beware of the Duck-billed Platitude, it will pull you in and drown you in your own tears of joy whilst you marvel at its cuteness.
01:46 AM - Apr 24, 2024
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Kat Reed
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I suddenly noticed the body of a parson lying on the ground in a ruined churchyard. I felt unable to leave him, and decided to bury him, decently. The parson's eyes flickered open, he was alive!

So I chopped off his head with a machete because, you know, zombies.

*Que 80's synth soundtrack*
02:16 PM - Apr 22, 2024
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Kat Reed
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A "kakistocracy" is a system of government which is run by the worst, least qualified, or most unscrupulous citizens.
01:10 AM - Apr 22, 2024
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Kat Reed
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On this day in 1611, Gerald of Winchester was arrested for throwing live piglets at the mayor.
06:43 AM - Apr 21, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Funny how you can say something in your head and it sounds fine...
11:38 PM - Apr 19, 2024
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Kat Reed
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For all the men that think a woman's place is in the kitchen... that's where all the sharp knives are!
01:24 AM - Apr 19, 2024
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Kat Reed
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If all the world's a stage and men and women merely players, who sells popcorn during the interval?
11:02 PM - Apr 17, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Seeing is believing... you can't see things if you don't believe in them!
01:26 AM - Apr 16, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
01:04 AM - Apr 15, 2024
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Kat Reed
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User error.
Replace user.
03:32 AM - Apr 14, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Do zombies use a Bag-for-unlife when they go shopping?
08:14 PM - Apr 12, 2024
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Kat Reed
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April is sexual assault awareness month.
I would like to remind everyone the causes of rape:
0% Short skirts
0% Drinking
0% Flirty behaviour
0% A promiscuous past
0% Walking alone
0% Night time
100% Rapists
05:28 AM - Apr 12, 2024
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Kat Reed
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Maybe we should introduce a condition called "Normal Disorder" for people who think there is nothing wrong with them?
01:07 AM - Apr 11, 2024
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