Andrew C__?
A
I'm not a business, man, but I'm pretty good company.
04:13 AM - Feb 03, 2023
Avatar Avatar
0
1
2
Andrew C__?
A
"The salary range for this position is $60,000 - $130,000."

I'd prefer the $130K option, thanks.
03:14 AM - Jul 16, 2023
Avatar
0
0
1
Andrew C__?
A
In the Silver Age, Superman was constantly tormented that he supposedly couldn't restore the shrunken bottle city of Kandor.

Meanwhile, he and Jimmy Olsen would shrink **and rebigulate** for a lil adventure-vacation in Kandor like four times a year.
05:56 PM - Jul 08, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Remember when one could be an edgy comic just by being angry about stuff like Muzak?
05:42 AM - Jul 04, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
07:27 PM - Jun 30, 2023
0
1
0
Andrew C__?
A
Vivek Ramaswamy is somehow an even worse version of Andrew Yang.
05:54 PM - Jun 11, 2023
Avatar
0
0
2
Andrew C__?
A
Tired: “Am I going out like Stan Chera?”

Wired: “Am I going out like Robert Hanssen?”
10:40 PM - Jun 08, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
I'm already dreading buying the Across The Spider-Verse blu-ray in a few months only to re-buy it a year or so later when the deluxe trilogy pack inevitably rolls out.
02:57 AM - Jun 07, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
That “AI drone killed its operator on purpose” story never made that much sense. There’s no reason an AI drone should know where its operator is.
https://jalopnik.com/drone...
06:28 PM - Jun 04, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Every time I see that Captain America “no, you move” speech, I can’t help but think of the old joke about the warship and lighthouse.
11:51 PM - Jun 02, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Food Network US site: I see you're coming from Canada. Would you like to continue to the recipe you were looking for, or go to FN Canada's home page? To be clear, FNC has the recipe too, _but we won't directly send you there_.
07:25 PM - May 31, 2023
Avatar
0
0
1
Andrew C__?
A
thread 3 Threaded Spouts
If an AI executive is worried about plagiarism at scale, or replacing artists with AI-laundered content, or replicating societal biases, or making disinformation easier, that’s one thing. 1/2
07:39 PM - May 30, 2023 (Edited)
0
3
0
Andrew C__?
A
I don’t know why, but a chow mein burrito is somehow slightly better than chow mein by itself.
03:47 PM - May 30, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
if only there were a solution to the self-imposed debt limit crisis that didn’t require Republican votes 🤔

IF ONLY
10:20 PM - May 19, 2023
Avatar
0
1
1
Andrew C__?
A
I wish my toothpaste and sunscreen had different shapes.
04:26 PM - May 19, 2023
Avatar Avatar Avatar
0
0
3
Andrew C__?
A
There are two main kinds of DeFi boosters. One are cynics who don’t actually mind that there are big players with outsized profits; they just mind that *they* aren’t those big players. These are the Alex Mashinsky’s and Andreessen Horowitz’s.

The other kind are marks.
02:37 AM - May 16, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
My five hundredth birthday party will be called the Quintessential Quincentennial.
01:29 AM - May 15, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Nothing says you're serious like having a multi day tantrum over the change to the cover of the Canadian passport.
03:36 PM - May 14, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
"Baby's feet much larger than expected" - Hemingway's first draft
03:48 PM - May 11, 2023
Avatar
0
0
1
Andrew C__?
A
Best Buy’s “TVs by type” menu lists all sorts of categories for TVs. What’s missing? 3D TVs, which the industry pushed relentlessly in 2010 but eventually dropped because there was no real demand for it. See also the Google Trends for the term.
03:36 AM - May 09, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Shouts to every Twitter coder spending their Saturday forcing free unwanted blue checks to legacy verified users.

It’s a lovely spring weekend in SF right now, but they’re hardcore, working at the office they’re effectively squatting in, with toilet paper sourced from home.
07:36 PM - Apr 22, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
I just saw an ad for Nutella and it turns out they pronounce it “nootella”.
03:50 AM - Apr 22, 2023
Avatar Avatar
0
4
2
Andrew C__?
A
Real Eyes Comprehend Genuine Deceptions
10:35 PM - Apr 20, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
Calling a chemical rocket whose best case scenario is reaching Mars “Starship” is like calling level 2 self driving—where you must keep hands on the wheel at all times—“Full Self Driving”. Or biPAP machines “ventilators”.
04:11 PM - Apr 20, 2023
Avatar
0
0
1
Andrew C__?
A
Imagine going to prison for life because you wanted to impress a handful of teens on the internet. So few you could fit them all on a regular size bus with room left over.
03:11 PM - Apr 14, 2023
Avatar Avatar Avatar
0
0
5
Andrew C__?
A
"Now served warm" is an incredible pitch.
01:40 AM - Apr 10, 2023
Avatar Avatar
0
0
3
Andrew C__?
A
You: "vermillion" should be a shade of green

Me: "grunion" should be a type of allium
06:44 PM - Apr 08, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
In the first movie, the backstory was that John Wick had killed so many people that he set up Viggo's gang to own the city.

But in the sequels, all of his new opponents have an inexhaustible supply of murder henchgoons. Now it's like emptying the ocean with a thimble.
08:10 PM - Apr 04, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
I want John Wick to have a two minute single shot soliloquy in the fifth movie.
11:26 PM - Mar 31, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
As a child, I thought intelligence was the most important thing about a person, but I’m smarter now.
05:15 PM - Mar 30, 2023
0
0
0
Andrew C__?
A
I imagine having a soulmate to do laundry and taxes with would be nice but I wouldn't turn down being a movie star either.
08:02 PM - Mar 28, 2023
0
0
0
loading...
{{ notificationModalContent }} {{ promptModalMessage }}