Jez Conolly
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Art School Girlfriend. Borrowing a bit from Massive Attack perhaps, but this one pamples my woodgies. https://youtu.be/0xjHygbcHZk
05:43 PM - Aug 07, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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I look at a lot of these adverts for twee ‘get away from it all’ holiday cottages in the middle of nowhere and I think ‘that’s the sort of place people go to to do themselves in’.
05:11 AM - Aug 07, 2023 (Edited)
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Jez Conolly
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If you’re going to kick down my door in the middle of the night, at least have the decency to bring cake!
05:10 AM - Aug 07, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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If your surname was ‘De’ath’ you’d change it, wouldn’t you? I mean, nobody would want to marry you. Who’d want to be called ‘Mrs. De’ath’?
10:15 AM - Aug 05, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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A recent charity shop acquisition. A good anthology, despite the cheesy wrapper.
02:59 PM - Aug 03, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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“You like all those funny films, don’t you. What was that one…the Texas Jigsaw Massacre.”
07:05 AM - Aug 03, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Bought a pair of shoes today. The lady in the shop took a while finding the ‘other’ shoe from the back room. When she finally reappeared she said ‘sorry I was a wee while, I’ve just had a delivery of ballet pumps and I had to fight my way through them to get this for you.’
09:25 AM - Aug 02, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Credit once again to psychic Hawkeye Caroline for spotting a box of film books at the back of the Mercat Bookshop today. Feast yer eyes on these beauties!
08:05 AM - Aug 02, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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As a child, I mixed up ‘hostel’ with ‘borstal’, and for a long time I was convinced that people who went to stay in hostels had done something wrong.
02:57 AM - Aug 02, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Be honest. That tin of prunes in your kitchen cupboard. Is it there because you really like prunes, or is it there just in case you get constipated?
02:56 AM - Aug 02, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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I do love a good Elizabethan house. The low door frames always remind me of the extent of malnutrition and poor bone density among the peasantry of the time.
02:55 AM - Aug 02, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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I’ve tried this elsewhere, and no consensus was reached, so let’s try here. What is the correct pronunciation of the word ‘scone’?

Scone

Scone

2 votes — 06:01 PM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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By the way, I wrote a book about The Thing.
02:56 PM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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I’m in the various Thing-related FB groups, and this has to be my favourite post so far in any of them.
02:55 PM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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This is Stonehaven, close to where I live. Not bad, eh?
12:43 PM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Wooden shelves, groaning,
Under the weight of paper,
From trees into words.
#haiku
12:37 PM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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09:44 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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‘Shingles’ sounds like it should be a nice thing. Like the name of a pet pony or a retirement cottage.
08:52 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Writer’s gag:

‘Why did I become an editor? Well, to cut a long story short.’
08:44 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Excited to see this! I have a chapter in it about watching weekday daytime TV in the 1970s through the haze of sleep-inducing cough mixture! Niche? Maybe. Good fun? Certainly!
08:37 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Bugger Barbie! I want to see a big screen treatment of Hugo, Man of a Thousand Faces!
08:22 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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“Jez Conolly - !Tat-tar-rat-tat!: Co. Offaly, Ireland. A post-nevertime kitchen sink drama of necrophilia, incontinence, self-mutilation, sloth and terror, as orchestrated and narrated by the sadistic misanthrope responsible for all our suffering.”

One for the nans and kids then!
07:43 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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Jez Conolly
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Hello Sputter!
07:29 AM - Aug 01, 2023
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