Abigail Joy
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thread 1/9
I have a 13yo, and I'm getting tired of hearing, "oh, that's a terrible age." As if we should just throw up our hands & suffer?
Every stage has its challenges. 13 is hard, but so is 23
so is 33
so is 43...
How about we try to help make things suck a little less for each other?
10:13 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 2/9
How about we analyze WHY, exactly, kids at this age are suffering, and help them through it?
"oh the hormones..."
Hormones are a cop out. Yes, hormones can make us feel weird. But if you're not scared of them, you can help kiddos ride the waves.
10:13 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 3/9
Tell them it's normal to have big feelings, to cry for "no reason," to love someone / something incredibly intensely. Help them deal with these emotions in healthy ways. Listen well, even if their problems seem small to you.
These are humans and they need love, not dismissal.
10:13 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 4/9
Don't blame everything on hormones. Maybe there are situational things that could be corrected to help them be a bit more comfortable.
Maybe swap out Doritos for organic baked chips, & ease some stress on their liver.
Maybe let them take a day off sometimes to decompress.
10:13 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 5/9
Maybe help detangle a social situation that seems impossible to the child, but has healthy solutions that an adult can see.
Maybe teachers at school can be allies.
Maybe noise canceling headphones can help with overstimulated nerves.
So many possibilities.
10:14 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 6/9
Like many folks, I suffered at age 13. I felt abandoned, because everyone thought it was just a phase. Maybe it was, but why is that an excuse to ignore someone's distress?
10:14 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 7/9
One of my best memories at that age is someone at church looking me in the eye, and she SAW me, and then gave me a big, long hug that probably lasted at least 2 minutes.
It was so healing.
I just needed someone to see my pain and to just BE THERE with me.
10:14 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 8/9
There are so many ways to walk WITH our children on this grand adventure of life, instead of dismissing them as "just hormonal" and leaving them to fend for themselves.
13 doesn't have to suck as much as it does. I truly believe that.
10:14 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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Abigail Joy
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thread 9/9
(I say all this, fully acknowledging that sometimes our kids are very challenging and annoying, and test our patience beyond its limits. I'm not saying parenting is easy, for sure. Take care of yourselves too, parents.)
10:15 AM - Oct 31, 2023
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