Timara (she/her)
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thread 1/6
I was scrolling through FB and one of the local mom groups I'm in asked: what age should you allow your child to wear opposite-gender Halloween costumes?

My answer was simple: when they're old enough to pick out their costume they're old enough to wear whatever gender costume they want.
09:20 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Timara (she/her)
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thread 2/6
I dislike when we try to adultify children, whether through their actions, choices, or intentions.

I think one aspect of parenting that isn't talked about is that we should raise children to think and act as they desire, not as we desire.
09:23 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Timara (she/her)
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thread 3/6
And that means that we have to make sure we don't pass down our limiting beliefs to children. They should be able to freely form their own opinions, especially when their opinions contradict ours.

It becomes a learning opportunity for them and a growth opportunity for us.
09:24 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Timara (she/her)
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thread 4/6
This parent's question reminded me when my son was younger and we went shopping for his Halloween costume. Despite my not introducing gender to him, he was fully aware of what he considered "boy" costumes and "girl" costumes.
09:26 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Timara (she/her)
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thread 5/6
And as his mom, my job was to reiterate that the costumes were for whoever wanted to wear them.

When it came to him picking who he wanted to be for Halloween, I just wanted him to be safe, as some of the toys that came with the costumes didn't always look safe.
09:27 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Timara (she/her)
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thread 6/6
How I relate parenting to raising free-thinking children, reminds me of how I was raised.

How many of us are walking around with our parents' voices in our heads? And those voices aren't always the kindest. I know I do. I'm trying to make sure that doesn't happen to my son.
09:30 PM - Aug 19, 2023
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Where is the love??
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Thank you for this. Undoing our own conditioning can be hard, but children reflect our attitudes back to us. We need to get out of our safe zones and think differently, so our kids don't end up as adults, trying to undo those same harmful, outdated ideas.
In response to Timara (she/her).
08:30 PM - Dec 08, 2023
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