Spiritual Annie
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thread 1/12
Today's my recovery date. It marks the last time I walked away from a physically abusive relationship in 1992 in order to save myself. It wasn't easy. There were, of course, threats. I also had two stepsons I knew I wouldn't be allowed to see again.
01:28 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 2/12
I had to let the schools know I would no longer be responsible for them. Because of my work, I had to let my boss know my unexpected change of address. And I had a therapy session already set up for the following week.
01:29 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 3/12
I had one question for the therapist: why did I continue to allow myself to be drawn into these abusive cycles? It took 2-1/2 years and a specialist trained in child sexual assault to help me find the answers.
01:31 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 4/12
I'm so used to thinking of today as my recovery date because, after all, it's been 30 years ago now, though I'm of the opinion that recovering never really stops.

But I'm going to have to get used to the idea of a new recovery date.
01:33 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 5/12
This one is for my physical health instead of my mental health, though I expect the work will be just as consuming in the short term.

I have a mitral valve in my heart that doesn't work very well. It's the reason I've had to spend so much time in the hospital lately, and become mostly bedridden.
01:34 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 6/12
In order to try to fix it, my Cardio is recommending placing a clip on the valve. While it's not open heart surgery, it's serious, and there are some lifestyle changes that will have to go along with it, like those two dreaded words: diet and exercise.
01:34 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 7/12
It will take time and work to recover, from 4 to 6 weeks.

It doesn't feel quite real yet, but I don't have time for it to. The docs want to put the clip in as soon as possible because of the effect of the bad valve on my health.
01:35 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 8/12
The longer we wait, the worse the effects and the more difficult the recovery.

I don't often miss opportunities anymore to share my gratitude for the people in my life. But this isn't a "just in case something happens" sentiment. It's already happening.
01:35 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 9/12
Regardless of the outcome, I want you all to know what a very special place you've created here. I may be more of a lurker than a spouter, but I appreciate everything each of you brings here and shares here. You've welcomed me and accepted my own weirdnesses, and I thank you for that.
01:36 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 10/12
I see my Cardio Monday where I expect the only question will be why a clip rather than a valve replacement, and the answer will be my overall health, which isn't great. Things should move quickly after that.
01:37 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 11/12
I'll post the date of the procedure as soon as I know, and I'll be giving my sister Mary my login info here so she can share the good news of the outcome. I expect nothing less because, to be honest, I don't believe I'm done with this life yet.
01:38 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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Spiritual Annie
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thread 12/12
I have a bit of inside info on that score I may share with y'all some other time.

Meanwhile, y'all keep being you because you're absolutely the best at doing just that. And I'll see you on the other side of this new recovery date as soon as I'm able.
01:38 PM - Jan 19, 2024
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