L.E Gray ⚓
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Got a critique saying that when written in 1st person, there is no need for "I see, I feel, I hear" etc. I agree to a point. True using I too much is bad.
In scene Hallie's (4 y) is on her uncle's lap, who sees her nod while they look map together
"I" wrong or not?
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01:39 AM - Feb 06, 2024
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Sherry denBoer
A
In response to L.E Gray ⚓.
My two cents: :)

Her small head pops up and down…

The perspective is clear without ‘I see her…’ and is supported later in the sentence with ‘I know…’

As the writer, the decision is yours to make. For me, dropping unnecessary words almost always makes the prose better.
10:06 AM - Feb 08, 2024
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