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🧵 I am
Child free & waited until I was 40 to find & marry the most decent man I know. I am able to give more to society b/c I am not raising my own kids. This conversation reminds me of a story I love to tell: My mom was a strong independent woman, but intellectually & emotionally she didn’t know
Nana of the Shire @Sunshines_Heart
I agree. Society has failed to raise their daughters with the belief that they are enough on their own and that they deserve to be treated with respect. So many of us were brought up to believe the fairy tale that we are incomplete without a relationship or children.
09:27 AM - Apr 06, 2024
09:36 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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Any different than the bag of 1950s gaslighting that every woman endured. I was raised to think I had to make myself likable and attractive to even the most ridiculous and disgusting men. For lots of other reasons I was really ashamed and insecure on the inside but always strong and composed on
09:38 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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The outside (adult child of abuse type of syndrome) I was also an athlete, a very strong little gymnast. I’m 59
Now but I used to be able to do double back flips !! Anyway, when I was 12 I was leaving a classroom and there was one other boy in the room. A cold steely eyed bully named Billy Adams
09:40 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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A real Aryan looking mofo who towered over me. I used to swing between the desks like they were parallel bars when no one was looking and he saw me. He said “you have big muscles on your arms”- I froze, I knew I wasn’t a skinny blonde “pretty” girl. I just looked at him and my nervous system
09:43 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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Was on fire with fear and shame. I swear my face lost all of its blood and I still remeber the feeling. Then he said “girls aren’t supposed to have muscles- it’s ugly, you are ugly”. Again….. I sank deeper into a terrified hole in the floor. But something in me- maybe one of my ancestors
09:45 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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Suddenly rose up and out of no where I said “well….. I could beat the shit out of you, you know”. He just looked at me a moment and turned around and left. Truth be told, I was still ashamed but I also felt victorious in a quiet way. I have always stood up to mediocre men and unfortunately
09:48 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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I have also been scapegoated for it. I’ve learned to do it more skillfully and one thing is for sure…. I will never quietly stand for the garbage of mediocre white men or any men.
09:49 AM - Apr 06, 2024
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Just thought I would add that I have survived a lot of trauma, & I’m convinced that being effective physically (as an athlete) gave me resilience & a sense of adaptability that I truly needed to survive. I don’t mean to simply defend myself, I mean in having a confident (or any) sense of self.
07:12 PM - Apr 06, 2024
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