Mark Harming
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thread 1/7
To each his own, so let me begin by saying if you disagree with me, it's fine.
This is just how I FEEL.
It's not meant to be right/wrong, I just want to vent a touch.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 2/7
Today is/was my Dad's birthday. He died 8 years ago in July.
However my sisters and others insist on "celebrating" his birthday.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 3/7
Which means every year, I'm treated to a string of "Happy Birthday" texts on this day.
(Whoever invented group texts, I loathe you).
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 4/7
My sister in-law tonight, is having a "cookout" in honor of my Dad's birthday. They invited the whole family over.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 5/7
My one sister, yearly, this is not an exaggeration, makes a birthday cake, and has her kids sing Happy Birthday to their dead Grandfather.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 6/7
I loved my Dad. But I feel this is too much. Of course,vi can't say anything. I'm already the black sheep of the family for...well you name it.
I just feel like they are participating in some sort of "I miss him the most" demonstration.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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thread 7/7
Thanks for reading this if you made it this far.
It's not a big thing. It's quite small in the grand scheme of things.
It just bothers me, and I wanted to vent.
08:16 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Li Milla4
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In response to Mark Harming.
I enjoyed it! 🌝💙
08:52 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Tracy I
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In response to Mark Harming.
I used to visit my FIL in the cemetery regularly. He was a gardener and I’d bring something from the garden. Now that MIL has joined him, SIL brings big ole store bought arrangements every holiday and posts to FB. I find myself not going.
08:33 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Mark Harming
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In response to Tracy I.
Oh WE would get along great!
I'm exactly that way.
08:35 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Li Milla4
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In response to Tracy I.
Aww, Such a expensive, wastefull way to show her grief. Bless her heart. Hopefully she's all happy, being her, all wrapped up in being herself!
09:05 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Francy NOT Fancy
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In response to Mark Harming.
I believe you nailed it. Sounds like nonsense to me.
08:33 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Tracy I
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In response to Mark Harming.
I understand, would also find this awkward. There are cultures who remember their loved ones this way, but you know in your heart if it’s sincere or performative.
08:31 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Karen Springer
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In response to Mark Harming.
You are not wrong. And the birthday cake thing definitely is a step too far.
Nice to remember your loved ones. But seems like you should get to choose how you want to do it, after all this time.
08:30 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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dariasteigman
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In response to Mark Harming.
It is a BIG thing, and I'm sorry.
Grief is intensely personal, and no one should try to tell you how to remember -- or miss -- someone.

And I feel you. For some reason, today was that random day I really miss my mom who died over 6 yrs ago.
08:28 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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Linda Careaga
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In response to dariasteigman.
It’s been 2 years and not a day goes by that I don’t miss my grandson. 🥲 Sometimes I wonder if I will ever shake this depression.
09:02 PM - Apr 13, 2024
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