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Some folks have asked me why I’m no longer CEO of ACCURACY ALERTS. I’ve had a couple of drinks, so against the advice of counsel, I’ll tell you.

I was at a board meeting, and one of the directors described my management style as “mercurial.”

I didn’t know what that meant, so I politely bit him.
10:53 PM - Apr 14, 2024
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Apparently that was not the right response, because he got a little shouty at me. Then everything went red, but I’m told I chased him around the office honking, and then threatened his entire family. Anyway, my lawyer says I deeply regret my actions and that we mutually agreed I should step down.
10:53 PM - Apr 14, 2024
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So now I’m legally required not to issue accuracy alerts, and also not to go within 100 yards of Accuracy Alerts HQ. It’s a bit awkward because I was nesting in my office, but I’ll find another place soon, maybe in a crowded park with lots of unsuspecting people to loudly make friends at.
10:53 PM - Apr 14, 2024 (Edited)
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