AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
thread 1/4
I wrote this back in 2016 after a close friend killed themself.

My father committed suicide when I was 12. But that sounds so distant and clinical and doesn’t quite give the full flavor of the situation.
11:04 PM - Jan 02, 2024 (Edited)
Avatar Avatar Avatar
0
21
32
AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
thread 2/4
What he did was kill himself and leave his 12 year old daughter behind to live with the never-ending remorse, guilt, regret and unfathomable loss that is unique to survivors whose parents chose to leave them in such a deliberate, I’m never coming back, fuck you, kind of way.
11:04 PM - Jan 02, 2024
0
23
AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
thread 3/4
This is something I’ve kept mostly secret because I felt such shame and discomfort whenever I imagined sharing it with anyone, but if my sharing this story keeps just one single person from having to live through this kind of loss, then it’s time I share.
11:04 PM - Jan 02, 2024
0
22
AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
thread 4/4
If you ever think your voluntary departure from your children, spouse, parents or loved ones is something they’ll get over, please listen to me when I tell you that you’re wrong. You are so very, very wrong.
https://988lifeline.org/
11:04 PM - Jan 02, 2024
1
33
AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
Yeah, I won't lie, that year (and a number of them afterward) hurt like hell. When my friend killed themself, I was unwilling to keep quiet any longer. Since then I've gotten a semicolon tattoo and I reach out more than before. It's gotten easier and easier to talk about.
In response to PS Annie.
11:22 PM - Jan 02, 2024
1
7
PS Annie
A
In response to AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn.
The first time I lost someone I loved, my late mother told me "time doesn't heal anything, but it will let you grow enough scar tissue that it doesn't hurt as much." Smart lady.
11:31 PM - Jan 02, 2024
1
13
AprilG Xn+2 = Xn+1 + Xn
A
In response to PS Annie.
Your mother is very smart.
It's weird how there are times when I barely notice it anymore & then there are these weird pivotal moments when it'll still hit me like a ton of bricks & it feels fresh again. When my friend took their life, it reopened old wounds for sure.
11:36 PM - Jan 02, 2024
1
2

 

{{ notificationModalContent }} {{ promptModalMessage }}