Socio-gen
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Same. I started behind the 8-ball (as a SAHM) and, once I was working and a single mom, I just couldn't get any traction.

I mentioned in a previous spout that my retirement "plan" hinges on being able to claim on my ex's Social Security (and either senior housing or my daughter's good graces).
k hola (she/her) @ktastrophicly
reality is that unless I create some wealth on my own I will never be able to retire. I got too late a start on saving and then too many life events
08:54 PM - Mar 23, 2024
09:25 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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k hola (she/her)
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In response to Socio-gen.
ugh the sacrifice you made and how big it was. would you have made the same choice had you known how difficult working would be?
09:31 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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Socio-gen
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In response to k hola (she/her).
I'm glad I was able to have that time with my kids (until the youngest was 4, the oldest 9), but it set me back in so many ways. Add in a health condition that was disabling but wasn't enough for disability and time demands (due to kids) that both restricted my ability to work to low-paying jobs....
09:37 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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Socio-gen
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The biggest regret I have was that I ever believed the lie we're sold that marriage is a woman's security.

I tell young women all the time: fuck that shit. Get an education, get yourself to (and stay in) a place of financial security, no matter what happens to your spouse.
In response to Socio-gen.
09:44 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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My Flying Car 2020
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In response to Socio-gen.
I was taught this. Most girls I grew up with were taught to take care of ourselves.
08:37 AM - Mar 24, 2024
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Socio-gen
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In response to My Flying Car 2020.
You were fortunate. Growing up in rural PA in conservative Christian circles, this was not the case. "Taking care of yourself" meant marrying well and (preferably) marrying early.

College? You're just going to get married, why go into debt?
Work? But being a mom is the greatest calling.

And so on.
08:50 AM - Mar 24, 2024
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MaxxMilly Browne 808
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In response to Socio-gen.
🥇
11:59 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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Anton Brakhage
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In response to Socio-gen.
Yep, money+knowledge to use it effectively is the real security in our world, to the extent that there is any.

It goes against my Leftist sentiments as to how the world should work, but that's how it currently does work. If you have wealth of your own, you have options without depending on others.
09:52 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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Socio-gen
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In response to Anton Brakhage.
I'm not saying one has to choose a career or job that will make you wealthy (ie: choose a business major over humanities), but that you have to think about how you'll survive worst-case scenarios - and not just divorce. My baby sis was widowed at 27. My brother has been laid off multiple times.
10:51 PM - Mar 23, 2024
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