Michelle Chipato
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My daughter didn’t get a medal in the championships final today in her dance comp. Her two best friends however did. She has won and lost before but this.. this seems to have knocked her out. Apart from telling her how proud I am, that she was a winner to me, how does an 8 year old deal with loss?😩
12:10 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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Nancy Norbeck
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In response to Michelle Chipato.
She needs to know she's still an okay person. That's the fundamental issue. She may be blaming herself or taking it as a sign that she's not as worthy as she thought she was. Showing her where you've failed and been better for it is also important, so she can see the opportunity in the loss.
12:35 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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Nancy Norbeck
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In response to Nancy Norbeck.
You might also remind her of all the things she's done well in the past, and where she's doing well right now. Make a list so she can see how long it is and keep adding to it. That's a very powerful tool (for anyone of any age!).
12:36 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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STEM TheBleeding
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In response to Michelle Chipato.
Loss is the most effective learning experience.

When we fail, we grow.

We become more well rounded through failure,

Success only teaches us that what we did works.

These aren't empty platitudes. They're understanding how winning a trophy can plateau an athlete's growth.
12:26 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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Michelle Chipato
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In response to STEM TheBleeding.
Thank you, such wise words. For a minute, just wished losses did not exist but you are right - a great learning experience l!
02:27 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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Peter Ryan
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In response to Michelle Chipato.
perhaps take the emphasis off what your daughter didn't get and teach her to be happy for her friends success. Then, teach her to work at what she fell short of this year, so next year she may have a chance at success and medals are not a birthright. You need to earn what you get
12:20 PM - Feb 04, 2023
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